The Other Side of the Pass
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By Elliot Jones
One of the most exciting days of my life was the first time I put on my coat as an Executive Chef. It was 2013 and I had moved from Denver to Little Rock, Arkansas to take over a kitchen that was struggling to make it. I was there for 2 years, and that launched 7 years of running high volume restaurants as the EC - until I landed the golden ticket - EC at one of the best steakhouses in Denver! I loved the title, the prestige, and knowing that I had achieved greatness after I had failed out of college; and had worked my way up from dishwasher to chef. But it carried a heavy toll.
It took a year at this steakhouse in Denver to make me lose my passion for the industry, after 15 years of cooking. Insane hours, high stress, a difficult owner who kept his chefs on their toes regardless of being on the line or on vacation. I had panic attacks in my sleep because of the pressure. Nightmares of inventory mistakes and guest complaints and never being good enough for the boss. My, now, fiancé, was ready to move back home because I would come home angry and exhausted, and we never had any time to spend together. I was missing every holiday and not seeing anyone I cared about because all that mattered was being chef. After a year, I quit. I was unhappy, burnt out and unsure of my future.
I took 5 weeks off for the first time ever in my life to wait for the perfect opportunity for a new chef job and I thought I had found it. A small Italian spot that wasn’t doing well and needed some love from a chef that just wanted to cook again. I went for it. I was cooking and creating again but we had no money. I would work expo and wash dishes. Work pasta and expo and wash dishes, because the restaurant couldn’t afford to have a dishwasher on weekdays. It was the opposite of the steakhouse in many ways, no overlord watching my every step and demanding perfect execution. Two cooks and no dishwasher vs 25 cooks with 6 dishwashers. I was exhausted though trying to work sauté, grill, pantry, pastry, and dish. Finally on a Friday night at 10pm I got a call from my best friend and former pastry chef. He had been working as a buyer for a produce company for a year and a half. He said simply, “Do you want out?” I was on my hands and knees on a wet floor scrubbing the side of the oven. I said “yes” without another thought.
Now I buy vegetables for a living as a produce buyer. 40-45 hours a week at a desk bringing in all the things chefs need. Potatoes, onions, dairy, and two-hundred plus items. It’s different but in a way that still keeps me connected to the industry I used to love so much. I can walk out of work at 4pm on a holiday weekend and know that I won’t get a phone call at 6am on a Sunday to come work brunch because the omelet guy didn’t show. I do miss being a chef. It’s just that the lifestyle can be toxic and it’s hard to have a life outside of the restaurant. When you’re 25-30, that’s great. I recently turned 37 and have been out of the kitchen for 2 years. I see my mom on Mother’s Day, my family on Thanksgiving, and my sisters on their birthdays. I am engaged to the women I love, who was ready to call it quits. I am no longer the Executive Chef and I am happy. - I am Elliott Jones. Former Chef. Current Produce Buyer.
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